Years ago I discovered a technique for opening the door for the sharing of the gospel. I can't remember from whom or from where I got it, but it has been invaluable to me personally. It is simply the word "FORM." It is an acrostic for......
F..amily---asking with interest about the person's family of origin.
O..ccupation---asking with interest about the person's line of work.
R..eligion---asking with interest about the person's religious background and preference if any.
M..essage of Christ.---moving to the story of who, why, and how Jesus did what He did.
The two questions asked in the Evangelism Explosion technique have for the past 30 years been my lead in from Religion... to the... Message of Christ.
This little acrostic gave me an order of thought when I desired [felt led] to share the gospel with someone with whom I had only a few moments. [As on an airplane.] It gave an opportunity for me to move relationally to the sharing of the gospel on occasion as I traveled. That only, of course, if and when I came to the point of actually sharing the gospel.
You see, I had to discipline myself to never hurry through it or to never ask questions for which I was really unwilling to take the time to listen to the answers. In other words, I didn't want to be disingenuous in any conversation. [Having an agenda that allowed me to be manipulative in my conversation. People are NOT stupid.] Notice I said "I didn't want to BE disingenuous" not "I didn't want to APPEAR to be disingenuous." It wasn't appearance I was concerned about. It was the reality of my heart. So...there were times I didn't get to the gospel at all but I sure had a good conversation.
All this to say, respect for the other person should never be lost in our zeal to share the message of Christ.
That leads me to thinking about how many outsiders [non-believers] view many of us who profess faith in Christ. I'm not talking about their natural disdain for the message of the gospel which does, by it's very nature, seem to make many people uneasy, angry, and argumentative which are some of the milder reactions, I might add, that I've seen from people through the years. I'm talking about their view of us when we are ourselves argumentative, angry, non-relational and just being old fashioned jerks. [In other words, all too often, like the typical SBC blogger. :) ]
I've met and talked with non-believers enough to know what many of them think of the average christian. It ain't good. There are reasons that certain sayings have become cliches. Sayings such as........
"People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care."
"What you are is speaking so loudly I can't hear what you're saying."
"Church people are nice enough - as long as I go where they go and do as they do."
"I want to have real relationships with real people, NOT add religious activities to my social calendar... "
These cliches all exist partly because some christians try to witness with little interest in the person with whom they may be attempting to share the good news of the gospel and with little insight as to the importance of relationship. As a result there is no sense of relationship at all but, rather, a sense of adding a notch to our evangelistic six-gun as one goes about "witnessing."
I don't believe real sharing of our Lord [witnessing] is a propositional thing anyway. It is, in fact, the sharing of life. Ours first and then ultimately the truth of His life and death on our behalf. That takes time and the building of trust in relationships for it all to happen sometimes.
On top of this, I do believe we are to love people period. It is not a thing of.. "I love them so I can share the gospel." The fact that my love will ultimately include sharing the gospel is a reality but does NOT discount the fact that it will include a lot of genuine love BEFORE that opportunity arrives. If I forget this I've ceased being a bona fide witness. Of course there will be those times when there is no possibility of a prolonged relationship where trust and confidence can be built because of circumstances. It is those times which I'm addressing in this simple post. I hope it helps.
The gospel IS seed and we have the delight of sowing that seed as we go about the living of life. But it has taken me the last two-thirds of this post to make sure we don't see the first one-third as a mechanical, propositional, and even artificial sharing of the gospel. There is no such thing as that when the gospel is REALLY shared.
Paul B.
8 comments:
This was our method, albeit without the acrostic, in the Shamgar training I took in 1970. With a couple additions, namely:
The transition (from Occupation to the Message): Asking if they were also interested in Spiritual things .. followed by a question about what a real Christian was...
and, after their responses ..
"Do you mind if I share what I see as the Bible answers to that?"
Most any plan will work if we will work the plan.
Good post.
Paul,
Thanks for a top article. I couldn't agree more.
I became firmly convinced that the treasure I carried in this cracked earthen vessel was my amazing privilege to share, but that I did not have the right to force it upon anyone. I needed their permission to give it to them. Bob's question and the E.E. questions lead to getting that permission.
As I watched other "evangelists" I soon realized that the problem for many unbelievers is that they DO KNOW a Christian/s.
As you say, "there is no sense of relationship at all but, rather, a sense of adding a notch to our evangelistic six-gun as one goes about "witnessing." "
I learned, as a young man, that I could "sell ice to an eskimo", and that I could quite easily get the right responses from those I was supposedly "evangelizing". Thankfully, I woke up sooner rather than later.
Paul, I learned also that we have no mandate from Christ to do evangelism, as we have come to know it, we are to "make disciples" which is a completely different kettle of fish, because it requires spending much quality time with individuals, which I believe gets back to every Christian being a minister of the Gospel.
Bob, Aussie John,
Thanks to both of you for good thoughts and suggestions about this topic.
Paul,
A great post.
It came to my mind as I was reading, that as we read through the gospels we never see Christ have the same conversation. His goals were the same: discipleship. But His conversation was as varied as were the people He conversed with. To those who often want to not "appear" disingenuous, I think that is a good reminder. Our form should never, EVER get in the way of living life with the person with whom God has put us in contact.
I've been delivering Meals on Wheels for a few weeks now. For one of the ladies that I deliever to I have to plan on at least fifteen minutes of conversation. Today, for the first time she asked me what I was studying (she already knew I was at Baylor). I mentioned that I was there as an MDiv student. She lit right up and said, "I could tell that from the moment we met. The way you care about people you just had to be." I didn't cry until I got back in my truck, but needless to say I was blown away. Sometimes, you just live life with people, being sincere, and they just know.
George Buttrick said, "Defects in preaching skill and sins in preaching method will be pardoned, if the man himself is sincere and if his very voice rings true." I imagine that is just as applicable to the Evangelist and Discipler as to the Preacher.
Chris,
What a great comment You have captured the essence of what I was attempting to say very well.
I love this quote and your summation of it. "George Buttrick said, 'Defects in preaching skill and sins in preaching method will be pardoned, if the man himself is sincere and if his very voice rings true.' I imagine that is just as applicable to the Evangelist and Discipler as to the Preacher."
Paul,
As to Chris's Butterick quote, "Yes Sir!"
Aussie John,
I must say that I think this comment of yours..."Paul, I learned also that we have no mandate from Christ to do evangelism, as we have come to know it, we are to "make disciples" which is a completely different kettle of fish, because it requires spending much quality time with individuals, which I believe gets back to every Christian being a minister of the Gospel..." deserves a post of it's own. You should consider writing it. Just my thoughts on a great comment.
Paul,
Thank you for your suggestion. If my memory serves me well (which it now doesn't always do), some time in the dim dark past of my blog I think I have written something similar.
I do think the subject is vitally important and worth repeating, and will do so.
After my comment, from which you quote, I read this quote, on Alan Knox's blog The Assembly of the Church from "When the Church Was a Family", by Joseph H. Hellerman, in which he says, "Church involvement in the New Testament sense means the development of intimate, healthy, long-lasting relationships with one’s brothers and sisters in Christ".
I thoroughly agree and maintain THAT is what Jesus was expecting His disciples to do, when He said, "Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you".
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