LEAVING A LOCAL CHURCH

A few years back Mary and I were feeling a need to make a change in our local church affiliation in the town where we live. There was no particular reason other than we believed we needed a different direction for us personally, and a dear friend had joined the staff of another fellowship in a town not too far from us and we believed we might be of some assistance to him. The group we were considering leaving was a wonderful and gracious group of people with whom we still share worship experiences and meals together once in a while.

We talked, thought, prayed, and grew in our appreciation for the fellowship that had called our friend, as they were also facing a theological issue that was close to our heart. We wanted to join in the search for an answer for which they were looking in a theological area that many local churches avoid examining. We liked their courage and heart for scripture.

We went to a Sunday service and left knowing we wanted to join them, and did the next week. That was six years ago. We may have that sense again sometime in the future and would do it again if it were to be needed. Who knows! By the way, the issue they faced? The resolution to it was not according to our personal viewpoint, but we didn't go for a particular resolution, just an appreciation for  their willingness to look at it.  [We were of some assistance to our friend too, by the way.]

Not long after that, I received an e-mail from someone asking my counsel on leaving the local church where they were presently affiliated and going to another. They were facing somewhat of a difficult problem however, and needed advice on how to do it in the very best way possible. I wrote to them and shared basically what I'm about to say on this post. I believe this is a good way, whatever the motivation for the doing of it. So, I thought I'd share it with a much wider audience. [All two or three of you who read my blog. ;) ] 

I'll start by admitting that I have a real belief that the body of Christ is larger than any one denomination or even a local congregation and I probably think of moving to a new fellowship as nothing really THAT significant. I guess that's because I see building relationships is what Kingdom stuff is all about anyway. So, if anyone, as an individual or as a family, sees a need for a change and it can be done without creating problems where they're leaving or where they're going__go for it__if you would like to__is my personal view.

I would hasten to suggest that you NOT be looking for or expect to find any fellowship or anyone in any fellowship, that is perfect and without problems, They don't exist. We all need to realize when we move, we're just really moving into an experience of new friendships with members of the body of Christ who have their own unique set of problems and struggles.

 It is ALSO important to remember that we're always to be a specific help wherever we go, along the lines of our giftedness and, while sometimes it may be more for us than them that we move, we are to enjoy the new fellowship and be a benefit along the way. No affiliation with a local fellowship is ever to be for the purpose of hiding. [Though sometimes healing is needed.] And any healthy relationship is to have a measure of reciprocity about it, I believe. It is never healthy when it is ONLY one way. Even local Church relationships.

[You can have a relationship with a surgeon where he/she is the only one giving, but that isn't what I call a healthy relationship in the sense of the word as I'm using it here. Thank goodness they know how to give what's needed... relationship or not...right?  Come to think about it, you reciprocate financially even then, don't you!] 

So my simple three suggestions would be...

1___Leave still in love with the people left behind, so you can return and enjoy fellowship once in a while, if at all possible.

2___Go in gracious acceptance of any new people and love them where they are, warts and all.

3__Always see the church as an ORGANISM instead of an organization, so that you never cut off or isolate yourself from ANY group, past or present, so you are able to maintain relationships with God's people wherever you find them.

If this rings your bell, great. If not, maybe the next subject will.

[You'll notice I hope, that my picture of a "local church" at the top is NOT  a building, but people.[

Paul B.